1 Thing

That I wasn't hoping for on my Thanksgiving trip/vacation?

A blizzard.

We (are supposed to) leave for home tomorrow (Tuesday). We'll see if the roads are open in the morning.

O Lord, please watch over all travelers when the winds blow and the snow falls to cover pure ice. Amen.

10 Things

That I'm looking forward to about my upcoming Thanksgiving Vacation. We leave Tuesday for a Northern Destination that was once Home. We'll be gone a whole w-e-ek.

In no particular order ...

1. My Aunt-in-Law's Beans.

2. Pumpkin pie

3. Chocolate Covered Potato Chips
... Not all 10 are about food...

4. Seeing my nieces and nephew

5. Taking a nap

6. Shopping on the crazy, Day After Thanksgiving

7. The long drive. Seriously.

8. Taking Baby Boy swimming

9. Having a cold drink on a cold night in my in-laws hot tub ... and recognizing that it's not the most responsible thing, I promise not to be alone.

10. Seeing my 96-year old grandmother

Happy Thanksgiving!

Friday Five

The RevGalBlogPal Kiddie Lit Edition

1) Earliest book you remember (read to you or by you)
Hmmm... there are a few that come back to me, probably not earliest, but certainly favorites -- an alphabet book, "The Mouse Book," "Bread and Jam for Francis" and, um the 'A' volume of the World Book... yeah.

2) Picture Book you would like to climb into
This is a tough one -- I always wanted to actually be in the game CandyLand, as opposed to playing it. And, I was really intrigued by the treehouses in the Berenstein Bears series...

3) Favorite series of books (then or now)
Again, another tough one -- Big fan of Anne of Green Gables and the other series by LM Montgomery that I'm blanking on...

4) Character you would most like to meet
The parents from Bread and Jam for Francis...

5) Last childhood book you re-read (for yourself or to someone)
Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?

Hope

It's snowing here in this midwestern city that I'm beginning to call home (after some seven-going-on-eight years). And, while the bitter cold that has rattled doors and shattered glass the past few days is not my favorite, there's a sense that winter is coming. And with winter, Advent. Hope.

It's cold and I wear gloves now with cute scarves and a vintage coat from my grandmother. I rush from the car to the house with my child and rub his cheeks and laugh with him at the cold. And with the warmth of the house, Thanksgiving. Hope.

The days are shorter and the leaves are on the ground and my more responsible neighbors have cleaned their lawns and put out the hoods for their rose bushes. But my rose bush continues to bloom, right there in the front of the house. I know that I need to cover it soon, perhaps tonight, but for now there is the garish pink of a rose against the drab gray. And with that color, Remebrance. Hope.

My extended family will be together in a week or so to celebrate Thanksgiving in bits and pieces of turkey and beans and pie and I'll probably need more than a glass of good wine to get it all down. But four generations of love and dysfunction will break bread together. And with that communion, Grace. Hope.

I am reminded this season of the great blessings that I have -- home and health and family and love and friends and enough of it all to go around. And with it all, Hope.

The Pie Meme

I love pie -- actually, I'd be more honest if I said that I love dessert and from there i'd have to say that I love breakfast as it can often be another excuse for dessert (see my post below re: nutella stuffed french toast).

I love meringue, but often don't like the pie that goes under it -- ie, lemon or the raisin cream that my mom seemed to make. Banana cream pie with meringue, that I can do.

Favorite pie? Probably would have to be a fresh strawberry-rhubarb pie ...

Pie that I liked that I wasn't expecting? Pecan pie that had been warmed -- served with coffee ice cream and hot fudge sauce.

Not a big fan of: pie crust -- I know that it can be well done, but it often stands in the way of enjoying a good pie filling.

TIps o' the trade

It's been a crazy week and without all the boring details of evening meetings and review boards and and and I spent about an hour in the office this afternoon before I shut everything down and left.

I wasn't upset, I just realized that for my own sanity, I didn't need to be there -- that I had done enough for the day and that I would be back tonight. Walking away from the builidng was very freeing; I'm not always able to do that without feeling tremendous guilt, but today it worked. And it made me start to think about developing other coping techniques so that I don't get to the point of cracking.

How do you do it? What are your tips and tricks o' the trade of living a healthy and balanced life? I'm not looking for the well-thought out exercise routine or the devoutly followed devotional plan -- because i'll be honest, my life isn't there right now; I'm happy to make it out of the house in the morning without forgetting anything crucial (ie, my planner, milk for the baby, the baby himself).

I'd love to hear about the little things that make you think "Ahhhhhhh -- that's better" when you do them and when I hear about them they make me think, "Ah-ha! I can do that!"

I'll share some of mine in a future blog.

Update & Nutella

One of the very first posts that I had queried folks about working on Saturdays. I was in a fairly bitter place at that point -- having just returned from maternity leave and having an in-the-office expectation for Saturdays placed upon me.

Today is Saturday -- a rather dreary, weather-turning colder one at that -- and I'm in the office. And I'm the only one here. And I'm being productive -- finishing up little tasks that I'd put aside for this day, doing some file cleaning, some organizing, and I'm OK with it.

Partially, I'm realizing that not only was I feeling like cracking because I was never home, but also because I was never fully at work, either. Today I'm fully here -- the Baby Boy is at home and I'm able to be efficient and productive and not resentful toward anyone. It's a really, really good feeling.

Also helped by the fact that I have a specific ending time with a really great reward -- an afternoon brunch with friends at a favorite breakfast place that has Nutella-stuffed French Toast. Is is breakfast? Is it dessert? Do I care? It's FANTASTIC and it makes me smile.

Cracking

I spaced a breakfast catch-up with a parishioner this morning. Completely and totally didn't think about it until I heard the voicemail this afternoon -- and I feel really, really crappy about the whole thing. I mean, I was the one who set the appointment up. We had confirmed the other night. I was looking forward to it.
She'll be OK with it and we'll go forward and I won't feel so bad, but it's all compounded by the fact that Baby Boy was up 4 times last night (usually once, maybe twice), I'm sick, my dear husband is sicker, I didn't actually see my child awake for more than an hour yesterday (including morning getting-ready time) and I probably won't be home tonight before he goes to bed, either.
I hate to whine, and didn't even want to post this rant/rage/pity post because I don't want to appear weak -- I mean, I should be able to do it all, right? Be a mom and a wife and a pastor and a daughter and make travel plans for the holidays and do the laundry and clean the house, right? I know, as I type it, how ridiculous it sounds and untrue. My husband and I share a lot (when he's not sick) and the house won't fall down if it's not clean. But I become irritable and my expectations of what I'm supposed to be able to do go up when my plate becomes over-full.
I desperately want to say, "I'm not doing it." Whatever it might be. But I also know that's not in me -- really. I'm just trying to figure out how to cope, how to get organized enough so that my life is manageable again. I don't want to be sad when I look at my house. I want to be able to enjoy what I do and the people I love. I don't want to be the super-person, but I would like to be on top of things enough not to subsist on luna bars and funsize butterfingers and coffee.
And perhaps most of all, I don't want the people closest to me to know that I'm cracking around the edges.

Reformation Day

Happy Reformation Day!

May our church always be a place where the voices of reform are voiced and heard.
However, as I told the 3rd graders that I was teaching on Sunday: If I received 95 complaints on one day, I'd probably cry.

Here's to Reforming and Trick-or-treating!

I keep a lot that should be thrown away

Here's one that I've kept since my days as a college RA. I think I've kept it only for the title and the first and the concept of a "Maytag's mothering."

Frumpy as I feel

My jeans need a Maytag's mothering tonight as I walk the halls up stairs and down Shhhhhhh I look straight ahead – don't see the glimmer of Lite. The lights burn strong candles don't die or burn low, but at both ends. I misplace things miss them in front of me Loreena Mckennit sings in the background while other things – my computer, the fridge, the lights, hum along. I wait. I read. I watch. I ponder divine inspirations. The snow falls, covers my mind, spins stories all night. As I walked down the stairs I figured my jeans needed a Maytag's mothering tonight.

May she rest in peace

At the front of the bus, or really, wherever she chooses to rest.

Rosa Parks died Monday (10/24) at the age of 92.

With praise and thanksgiving for her witness, Amen.

Friday Meme

The Friday RevGalBlogPals Meme...

1. What was the last CD you purchased?
I honestly can't remember -- isn't that sad. I've become a big fan of Paste magazine and each of their issues comes with a sampler CD, so that's a possibility. But I think it might have been The Barenaked Ladies Holiday album.

2. Did you like it?
I loved it -- especially the version of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen that's on there.

3. Is it the kind of music you would call your favorite?
Apart from being the holiday cd, it is. It's fun and a little folky and random.

4. What was the first album (CD for you youngsters) you ever owned?
They Might Be Giants "Flood" was the first CD that I bought. I know I had tapes before that but can't remember specifics -- some U2 and some REM.

5. And what was your favorite cut from that recording?
"Particle Man" or "Constantinople" It's been awhile since I listened to it -- I probably have the whole thing memorized and don't realize it. Ah, precious brain space.

Sweet stewardship

Sometimes someone will say something to me that sticks with me.

Here is what's been tumbling in my head this week:

After worship Sunday morning, by this 70-something Army widow who is the epitome of charm and togetherness that I aspire to be: "Now Pastor, that was about the sweetest stewardship sermon I have ever heard. And let me tell you, I've been around for a lot of them."

Sojourners

Note: If I were typing this at work (on a PC) or had the energy to fire up Foxfire (since I'm at home using a Mac), I would create all sorts of fun links to go along with the following post. But, since I am at home using my Mac and blogger doesn't support the Safari browser, or however that works, there aren't easy little shortcut keys to create links. So, just pretend.

The most recent issue of Sojourners arrived in my mailbox at work today. It was their fall books and music issue. After sifting through the recommendations in the Christian Century, I wasn't sure that life could get much better. But it did. This issue of Sojourners is full of what appear to be interesting books and ear-pleasing music. Some of which (Over the Rhine) I'd never heard of until a few days when Katherine over at "any day a beautiful change" (kewp.blogspot.com) referenced the new cd. And now they appear in this delightful publication. Others, such as Dar Williams, have been staples in my listening rotation for years and I was practically giddy to realize she has something new.

They also have reviewed some children's/young adult books -- something that gets done far too infrequently and I often have no idea either what to recommend to folks with kids that age or to buy for my nieces.

I didn't have time to get through it completely, but I look forward to doing so.

If you don't get Sojourners, check out their website (www.sojo.net).

Getting sucked in

This morning, when I should have been getting myself or The Baby Boy ready for the day, I got sucked into too many of those little quizzes that tell you something about yourself and then you can post them on your blog. There's a whole page of them. I'm sure that you knew that before I told you.
I could tell you what color my blog should be, what summer car I am, what kind of pizza I am.... and the list goes on for longer than I care to admit.
They reminded me of the sorta fun (did I just say that??) ice-breaker games that we played at camp and in the dorms and at the start of confirmation... Except instead of the answer being generated for me, I had to come up with something meaningful on my own in response to a pretty pointless question or inquiry about a favorite.
Some of my answers have varied, but others have always been the same to these questions. Come on, play along. You know you want to....

If you were an animal, what would you be and why?
I've always said a koala -- because I think they're really-really cute. And, deep down, I guess I wanted people to think that I'm really-really cute.

If you could live anywhere, where would you live?
A tough one -- tonight, after being with people for a long time, I'm dreaming of someplace remote. My main requirement -- that it have some scenery, or at least be close to some!

What is your favorite color?
Green or blue or pink

How did you get your name?
Both my first and middle names are incredibly common, generationally-driven. I always wished my parents had been a bit original. My Blogger name came about because of my love for a certain pair of shoes and the time I dared wear them in the pulpit!

So, there you go -- a few ice breaker questions and my responses. What are your 'favorite' ice breakers? What are your responses?

The Friday Meme, done Saturday

With kudos to the revgalblogpals....

1) The weather in your location
Sunny, crips, autumnal and lovely

2) Where you are typing this
In my living room

3) Where you might like to be sitting if you could be anywhere
In a luxurious hotel, perhaps on a beach

4) A chore you have to do this weekend
Some laundry

5) Something delightful you will do or would like to do this weekend
I'd love to pick some apples and take some outdoor pictures of The Baby Boy

Reading

Just finished (ie, plowed through, was thoroughly unable to stop) reading Ruth Reichl's latest: "Garlic and Sapphires: The Secret LIfe of a Critic in Disguise." Reichl is currently the editor of Gourmet magazine but has been the food critic for both the LA Times and the NY Times and this memoir recounts the disguises she wore and the adventures she had while working for NY.

This is a fantastic read, especially if you enjoy reading about restaurants you'll never visit and food you'll never eat. She intersperses recipes, too -- a few of which look doable by even the most amateurish of cooks. Ah, if only I had a bit more time... anyway.

I'm always looking for my next good read. Any suggestions?

A "Good Pastor"

So a while back I had some days of contemplation -- days in which large parts were spent thinking about things. Sometimes it spiraled into the abyss. Other times I was left to ponder seemingly simple questions.

I know that there's no right or wrong answer to this question, and I'm trying to formulate my own thoughts around it. But, what makes a good pastor? People say, "You're a good pastor" but what are they responding to? Because I laugh at their jokes and they think I'm "fun" and remind them of their granddaughter or daughter?

Is a pastor good (and I'm not even sure that's the language that I want to use) when she listens well, preaches with integrity and honesty, and can be a prophet?

Is a pastor good when she can be an administrator and have good follow through?

Is a pastor good when she facilitates not only meetings but growth and challenge?

Like I said, I don't know the answers (and I'm having a hard time articulating the question), but I am thinking about this.

The way continuing ed should be: Brueggeman and Bombay

Last week Walter Brueggeman presented the annual Christian Century lectures. I didn't know what to expect -- some people can write, but can't speak in front of people without being boring. I hoped, since he's been a professor for so long, that he could do his share. I also hoped, that he could speak to us as pastors, not students, by which I mean this: I hoped that when I walked away on Friday afternoon that I would have something that I could use.
I was not disappointed.
He taught.
He listened.
He invited feedback.
He was thoughtful.
He made me think. (And that was OK.)
He reminded me that being a pastor is all about being a student -- that what I love about being a pastor is learning and learning and learning so that I can share that with others. Sometimes I get wrapped in the tedium of the day and forget to learn, sometimes simply for the sake of learning.
Of course, starting Thursday evening with a beautiful Bombay Sapphire martini didn't hurt, either.
Brueggeman and Bombay -- Cheers.

What's in Your Car?

I pulled into a parking spot this morning and looked around my car. It was quite the hovel.
To be honest, for the most part, it still is.
While on a certain level I was embarassed by what surrounded me, I was more curious about what the contents of my car said or say about me.
When you walk past a car in a parking lot, do you ever catch a glimpse of what's in the car and have a little clue of what that person's life might be like?
Maybe I'm the only one.
Regardless, I thought I'd share a few of the things that you could see if you looked in my car windows....

1. A to-go bag from McDonald's (this was the most embarassing part)
2. My home communion kit
3. The car seat base
4. Bulletins from the past couple of Sundays.
5. The Baby Bjorn baby-carrier
6. An empty Starbucks cup
7. A bib
8. A vintage red Pyrex mixing bowl that I bought at a garage sale that hasn't quite made it in the house.
9. A road map
10. A package of gum

What would I see if I looked in your car?