Since writing about making hair appointments, I've thought about what makes me feel grown-up. I mean, by all practical purposes I am. I was mistaken for the mom of a confirmation student this summer, after all... (which would have required me to have been a mom at 17, biologically possible, but there's where the possiblity stops).
I know that age is a state of mind and that we settle into groups based less on calendar age and more on similar interests and location and perhaps the age of our off-spring. I know that there are 22 year olds who run companies and 65 year olds who work for an hourly wage at the big-box store.
But it's those little moments that jolt me out of my day-to-day thinking that I'm, oh, I don't know, 22? 23? Even though my education and my child should be the big things that remind me that when I really was that age, seminary and kid(s) were far, far, far from my mind.
Like making hair appointments in advance. Realizing that those just might be fine lines around my eyes -- the kind of fine lines that one could buy expensive creams for, if one were so inclined. Noticing that I really can't stay out like I used to. Being concerned about things like pensions and life insurance and saving for education (even though our student loans are, well, still loans). And this week, hearing my husband say in conversation, "Well, our mortgage broker thinks...."
So, what are the little jolts that remind you of your place in life, young or not?
10 comments:
well, I feel old when people so much younger than me are thinking about grown up things like mortgages and pensions. I don't know it I'll ever grow up.
But PPB, at 27 you're years younger than me!!! :)
I am buying a condo and saying those things like "my mortgage broker..." and "my accountant..." and that makes me feel uber-grownup. probably more grown-up than most people my age. it's actually a little creepy.
this week, though, it was looking at refrigerators that did it. I couldn't believe I was seriously contemplating spending $1500 on a refrigerator and thinking of that as totally worth the investment. How often do 26 year olds think in terms of "investment"?
yesterday I heard myself say - "I went to the chiropractor and had a yoga class today..." which made me feel old, because in my 20's I never did anything with or to my body, and it always just stayed pretty much the same. Now I have to like exercise and stuff or there's trouble.
First, teri, I'd like to say that I'm a 26 year old who's been thinking in "investment" terms for a very long time.
But I did have a little bit of a meltdown the other day, realizing that IF there are no more holdups, I'll have my MDiv at 30. It was making me feel like my 20s have slipped away without my doing anything really important. (Or fun, for that matter. If you're not going to be successful, you ought to at least be having a really good time...)
Having had a recent birthday did it....which led to thinking...if I go to seminary...it'll be at least a year from now...plus three years...plus one year internship....I'll turn 30 at sem....
(had the mortgage for like 3 years now...still freaks me out!..that reminds me I need to write a check)
Hi, Pink Shoes! Thanks for stopping by. I tried your e-mail link in your profile and nothing happened. Is there some trick I should know?
As soon as my friends started retiring, I started feeling like I should be a grown up now. However, that didn't sound like much fun, so I decided against it.
Besides, I have another 17 to go before I can retire.
With my birthday looming tomorrow, and the realization that I started seminary 20 years ago this fall, I'm feeling rather old. But, what's more scary is that only having lived in parsonages, I have no mortage broker...or for that matter no house and no refrigerator that I actually own... only a little piece of empty land where maybe there'll be a retirement house one day (which seems closer every day!)
Two things make me feel my age: the realization that next year will be my 20th high school reunion and doing the math to realize that I'll be 50 (50!) when my daughter graduates from high school.
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